05 Aug Emotional Regulation Techniques Every Parent Must Learn
Emotional Regulation Techniques Every Parent Must Learn
If you’re a parent, one of the most powerful things you can do for your child is to learn how to regulate your own emotions. Emotional regulation techniques aren’t just useful in moments of overwhelm, they’re foundational for creating a secure emotional environment where children feel safe, seen, and supported.
When we suppress or ignore our emotions as parents, it doesn’t make them disappear it simply stores them in the body, often leading to anxiety, depression, and physical illness. Outlets like workoholism, chronic busyness or people pleasing are a sign of unprocessed feelings and emotions.
Many parents don’t realise that their children’s frequent emotional outbursts may be a sign of unresolved emotional wounds within themselves. Children are incredibly perceptive and absorb our energy, tone, and nervous system state, often before they understand the meaning of words. While many of us ‘mask’ to function in society our children are unfiltered and raw, and our ability to hold space for their big emotions is directly correlated to our ability to process and manage our own, and our ability and willingness to reflect, apologise, learn and try to do better.
Are You Unintentionally Invalidating Your Child?
Many parents, trying to soothe or discipline their child, end up unintentionally invalidating their emotions. Here are common phrases that do more harm than good:
- “You’re fine, stop crying.”
- “There’s nothing to be scared of.”
- “Don’t be silly, it’s not a big deal.”
- “Stop being a baby.”
- “You’re being too sensitive.”
- “It makes me sad when you cry.”
- “Calm down!”
- “Stop being dramatic.”
- “It’s not that bad.”
- “Other kids have it worse.”
These statements can create shame around emotions, sending the message that it’s not safe to express feelings leading to long-term emotional suppression and disconnection. When we can sit with our own uncomfortable feelings (sadness, anger, grief, anxiety) with love and compassion, without trying to change the feeling, then we pave the way for building emotionally resilient children into emotionally evolved adults.
Why Parents Must Learn to Regulate Themselves First
When parents haven’t processed their own emotional history, they are more likely to react to their child’s emotions instead of respond. Reactivity often stems from unhealed inner child wounds. This is why doing your own healing is not a luxury it’s a necessity. It starts with you, as the parent.
At my Regulation Station, a dedicated space I bring to family festivals, children and parents explore sensory tools and calming strategies to support emotional balance. But the tools are only part of the picture real change happens when parents commit to doing their own inner work.
Emotional Regulation Techniques That Work
You don’t need to be perfect (perfectionism is the highest form of self-abuse and something we as parents don’t want to be passing down to our children!) you just need to be present and emotionally available. Here are a few techniques I offer that can create massive shifts:
- EFT Tapping (Emotional Freedom Technique): A powerful way to release trapped emotional energy from the body in minutes.
- Inner Child Healing: Helps you connect with unmet needs from your childhood and heal emotional wounds that still impact you today.
- Hypnotherapy: Allows you to reprogram deeply rooted patterns and beliefs that cause emotional dysregulation.
Try This:
- Pause and name the emotion you’re feeling (“I’m feeling overwhelmed.”)
- Tap through your collar bone (one of the EFT points) while breathing slowly and consciously.
- Ask yourself: “What would I have needed to hear as a child in this moment?”
- Use validating language with your child: “I see you’re upset, and that’s okay. I’m here.”
You are your child’s emotional role model. The more you practice emotional regulation techniques, the more your child will learn how to feel, express, and move through their own emotions in a healthy way. This isn’t just parenting it’s reparenting yourself.
Ready to break the cycle?
Book a session with me to begin healing today so that you and your children can thrive together.
Book a free consultation or explore personalised support for you or your loved ones.
Contact me here – https:/contact-me/
Request a call with me here: https://calendly.com30-minute-clarity-call
More from me here: https://how-to-practice-self-love/
https://amzn.to/452BHJx (an emotional regulation tool for kids)
https://amzn.to/41qITwP (an emotional regulation workbook for kids)
https://amzn.to/3J5z1lP (recommended reading on emotional regulation for parents)