30 Mar How to Reconnect with My Mother
How to Reconnect with My Mother; Healing the Mother Wound
Mother’s Day can bring up complex emotions, especially if you carry the weight of a difficult mother relationship, are estranged or if she has passed away. Healing this wound allows for greater self-love, emotional freedom, and healthier connections. When considering how to ‘reconnect with my mother’, if your mother is alive, you’ve no doubt been trying for a long time to connect with her and have hit a brick wall time and time again as she refuses to listen, validate you and take accountability for any questionable behaviour, leaving you feeling frustrated, angry and at a complete loss with what to do.
The first step to reconnect with your mother, is an inside healing job, because without 2 receptive parties, connection cannot be made. Generational trauma keeps toxic cycles of dysfunction present and thriving. There’s no guarantee that healing the mother wound will transform your relationship with your mother (because no one can change other people, only themselves), however healing the mother wound through inner child healing will help you find a sense of peace, acceptance, love for self, which facilitates breaking the cycle for future generations and ultimately enhances well-being.
What is the Mother Wound?
It’s my belief that we all have a mother wound, due to the fact that we are imperfect human beings. The mother wound stems from generational patterns of neglect, criticism, or emotional unavailability. Many mothers, due to societal pressures or their own unresolved pain, struggle to provide the unconditional love and support their children need. This wound is often passed down subconsciously.
How Do We Develop the Mother Wound?
If …
- You felt emotionally unseen, dismissed, or criticised as a child
- Love was conditional based on achievement, compliance or obedience
- You felt it was your job to make your mother happy, take her pain away, or care for her
- Your mother has passed away
- Your mother struggled with her own emotional pain and couldn’t provide deep nurturing
- You witnessed your mother being abused
- Your mother had dependency/addiction issues
- Your mother struggled being a single parent and was physically absent due to financial pressures
- You experienced enmeshment or a lack of personal boundaries
- You were ‘parentified’ – expected to look after your siblings
- You experienced any type of abuse or neglect at the hands of your Mother
- Your mother was emotionally unavailable
- She was involved in dysfunctional romantic relationships
- Your mother favoured another sibling
- Your mother turned a blind eye to abuse you experienced at the hands of others
How the Mother Wound Manifests in Adulthood
- Low Self-Worth: A persistent feeling of not being “good enough”
- Estrangement or challenging unfulfilling relationship: Choosing, low, minimal or no contact due to struggling to maintain a positive nurturing relationship
- People-Pleasing: Seeking external validation at the expense of your needs
- Difficulty Setting Boundaries: Fear of rejection or guilt for saying no
- Emotional Dysregulation: Struggles with self-soothing or expressing needs
- Unhealthy Relationship Patterns: Repeating cycles of neglect or co-dependency
Healing Through Inner Child Work
Inner child healing helps you reconnect with and nurture the wounded parts of yourself.
Steps to Heal:
- Acknowledge & Validate: Recognise the pain without self-blame
- Reparent Yourself: Offer the love and affirmation you needed as a child
- Use Hypnotherapy & Coaching: Rewire subconscious beliefs and create new emotional patterns
- Set Healthy Boundaries: Learn to honour your needs without guilt
A Gift of Self-Healing
This Mother’s Day, whether you have a loving relationship with your mother or a complicated one, or whether she is no longer here give yourself the gift of healing. You have the power to break the cycle and embrace your own inner nurturing.
Ready to Heal?
Reach out for a free consultation and start your journey to self-love today!
https://rebeccadakin.com/contact-me/
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